As I sat on the couch this morning after eating No Bake cookie #3 and it was only 10 am, and was holding my twelve and a half pound Texas souvenir I began to cry. So, to keep myself from eating cookie #5 I am writing. And not I didn't mess up my numbers I already had cookie #4. Today is a very dark, cloudy, pouring rain day. Days like this tend to be a little depressing for me so it kind of plunged me into a pity party since last week we had our first year anniversary of being in Texas. I have been pondering this for several days. In many ways it has gone so fast and phone calls and blogs have really helped. In this whole year I have had only 2 maybe 3 short bouts of homesickness for family and friends and Logan. But, today is probably the hardest day yet. I am tired of being strong. I just plain miss my family. I just miss sitting and talking face to face with my sisters and sisters-in-law. I miss hanging out with all the "girls". I miss my walking and running buddies. I miss sitting around and watching a big group of kids play while the moms sit and talk. I miss the phone conversations that come being in the same town (it is different). I miss Gossners and cheap cheese. I miss good ice cream (Good ice cream can not be found here). I miss dry air (humidity was 90% last week). I miss the mountains. I miss leaves that change color in the fall. I miss being able to open my windows at night. I miss being able to go to the store with all my kids and just being one of the masses in the norm and not being a freak show with SO many kids. I miss seeing my nieces and nephews grow up---I haven't even seen 2 of them yet and they are already 9 mos old!!! I miss family parties. I miss neighborhood parties. I miss the Logan library and their cheap overdue fines. I miss Maceys grocery store and all their good prices. I miss the Willow Park zoo. I miss roads that are wide enough to have cars parked on each side of the road and still have enough room to pass a car going the other direction. I miss church being a block away. I miss being minutes from a temple. I miss Logan Parks and Rec. And, if you are reading this, I miss you!!
Okay, so you get the idea. I am just plain homesick. Texas is great and I have learned a lot and made some good friends. But I really need to come visit. Almost every day I think about the visit we are hoping to make in November. If for some reason it doesn't happen, I might go crazy.
Thanks for reading the ramblings of a cooped up, tired, bored, homesick gal.
6 comments:
I miss you too. If you don't make it in November, I will probably cry. Its one thing that I am looking forward to. I miss having someone to do all those things with. I wish I was there to share the cookies with you :) I will call soon, and I need you address again!!
Amme, I miss you too! Sometimes it seems like yesterday that we all sat around visiting and watching kids play out back, running around with blisters after a LONG day at an amazing Women's Conference, and eating yummy cinnamon rolls and rolls shaped like turtles. I can't believe you've been there a whole year. I usually don't feel homesick either, but I get my moments and I've only been here for 2 months. I can totally commiserate about being a freak. It's not as bad here as it was in AZ but still we cause a scene EVERYWHERE we go. Some days I just don't feel up to it. There are so many times I just don't want to leave the house because I don't want people staring, and counting, and commenting. It is compounded too by the fact that I am already so self-conscious because of my weight. I have struggled for so long with it and it is just hard. Now I'm crying with you. Hang in there and know that we are all missing you too. :)
I think I could meet you halfway and pick you up! ;) Oh, Amme! I wish you were here... I have no kids today and I could just take care of you! But, remember this, I will always be here, remembering you and loving you and missing you, but there are probably some people there who are needing you now as much as I needed you "then." Reach out and find them and before you know it, you will be home again. But, please, when that happens, promise you'll still miss me sometimes and visit!
Oh Amme, you made me cry. I feel the same way some days. It is just so hard to be away from family and friends and the LDS culture and the open dry air. I hope you have better days. I try to look at all the good things in my life, but some days it is just so hard. Keep smiling:)
I'm so sorry you're feeling blue! I hope you get to visit your family soon. I know how it is being far from family. It's tough!
We miss you guys too! November doesn't seem soon enough, but it will be here faster than you know it. I am so sorry! That is so hard. We can't wait to see all of you!!
Post a Comment